Amanda Bynes celebrates three years of being sober, opens up about her drug addiction in the past

Paulea Benoza

<p style=' color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;'>A post shared by <a href='https://www.instagram.com/papermagazine/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' style=' color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px;' target='_blank'> Paper Magazine</a> (@papermagazine) on <time datetime='2018-11-26T21:36:04+00:00' style=' font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px;'>Nov 26, 2018 at 1:36pm PST</time></div></blockquote><script async src='~//www.instagram.com/embed.js' type='text/javascript'></script><p> <p>According to her, Adderall became her drug of choice after learning that the pill helps women to stay thin. Amanda said that she went as far as faking an attention deficit disorder just so she can get her hands on the medicine.<p>"When I was doing Hall Pass, I remember being in the trailer and I used to chew the Adderall tablets because I thought they made me [more] high [that way]. I remember chewing on a bunch of them and literally being scatterbrained and not being able to focus on my lines or memorize them for that matter.<p>"I remember seeing my image on the screen and literally tripping out and thinking my arm looked so fat because it was in the foreground or whatever and I remember rushing off set and thinking, 'Oh my god, I look so bad’,” shared Amanda, who eventually walked out from the project.<p>The same happened during the making of her next film, Easy A, where Amanda started to experience adverse effects in her brain due to drug abuse. “I was high on marijuana when I saw that but for some reason it really started to affect me. I don't know if it was a drug-induced psychosis or what, but it affected my brain in a different way than it affects other people. It absolutely changed my perception of things."<blockquote class='instagram-media' data-instgrm-captioned='' data-instgrm-permalink='https://www.instagram.com/p/BqqOi1jAV5k/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' data-instgrm-version='12' style=' background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:540px; min-width:326px; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);'><div style='padding:16px;'><div style=' display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;'><div style='background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;'> </div><div style='display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;'><div style=' background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;'> </div><div style=' background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;'> </div></div></div><div style='padding: 19% 0;'> </div><div style='display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;'><a href='https://www.instagram.com/p/BqqOi1jAV5k/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' style=' background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;' target='_blank'><svg height='50px' version='1.1' viewbox='0 0 60 60' width='50px' xmlns='https://www.w3.org/2000/svg' xmlns:xlink='https://www.w3.org/1999/xlink'><g fill='none' fill-rule='evenodd' stroke='none' stroke-width='1'><g fill='#000000' transform='translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)'><g><path d='M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631'></path></g></g></g></svg></a></div><div style='padding-top: 8px;'><div style=' color:#3897f0; 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border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;'> </div><div style=' width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg)'> </div></div><div style='margin-left: auto;'><div style=' width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);'> </div><div style=' background-color: #F4F4F4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);'> </div><div style=' width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);'> </div></div></div><p style=' margin:8px 0 0 0; padding:0 4px;'><a href='https://www.instagram.com/p/BqqOi1jAV5k/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' style=' color:#000; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none; word-wrap:break-word;' target='_blank'>"I have no fear of the future. I've been through the worst and came out the other end and survived it so I just feel like it's only up from here." #amandabynes #breaktheinternet #linkinbio</a><p style=' color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;'>A post shared by <a href='https://www.instagram.com/papermagazine/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' style=' color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px;' target='_blank'> Paper Magazine</a> (@papermagazine) on <time datetime='2018-11-26T22:09:59+00:00' style=' font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px;'>Nov 26, 2018 at 2:09pm PST</time></div></blockquote><script async src='~//www.instagram.com/embed.js' type='text/javascript'></script><p> <p>Looking back, Amanda, who shot to fame after starring in American sketch comedy show All That from 1993 to 2010, bared that she feels ashamed and embarrassed for her dark past. "I just had no purpose in life," she says. "I'd been working my whole life and [then] I was doing nothing. I had a lot of time on my hands and I would 'wake and bake' and literally be stoned all day long. ... I got really into my drug usage and it became a really dark, sad world for me."<p>Now, Amanda is nearing her fourth year of being sober, and is set to finish her studies in Fashion Institute of Design and Merchandising, taking up a degree in Associate of Arts, in Los Angeles this month. However, she has yet to decide whether or not she will make her comeback in showbiz.<blockquote class='instagram-media' data-instgrm-captioned='' data-instgrm-permalink='https://www.instagram.com/p/BqqUs08A6vf/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' data-instgrm-version='12' style=' background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:540px; min-width:326px; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);'><div style='padding:16px;'><div style=' display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;'><div style='background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;'> </div><div style='display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;'><div style=' background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;'> </div><div style=' background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;'> </div></div></div><div style='padding: 19% 0;'> </div><div style='display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;'><a href='https://www.instagram.com/p/BqqUs08A6vf/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' style=' background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;' target='_blank'><svg height='50px' version='1.1' viewbox='0 0 60 60' width='50px' xmlns='https://www.w3.org/2000/svg' xmlns:xlink='https://www.w3.org/1999/xlink'><g fill='none' fill-rule='evenodd' stroke='none' stroke-width='1'><g fill='#000000' transform='translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)'><g><path d='M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631'></path></g></g></g></svg></a></div><div style='padding-top: 8px;'><div style=' color:#3897f0; 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border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 20px; width: 20px;'> </div><div style=' width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 2px solid transparent; border-left: 6px solid #f4f4f4; border-bottom: 2px solid transparent; transform: translateX(16px) translateY(-4px) rotate(30deg)'> </div></div><div style='margin-left: auto;'><div style=' width: 0px; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-right: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(16px);'> </div><div style=' background-color: #F4F4F4; flex-grow: 0; height: 12px; width: 16px; transform: translateY(-4px);'> </div><div style=' width: 0; height: 0; border-top: 8px solid #F4F4F4; border-left: 8px solid transparent; transform: translateY(-4px) translateX(8px);'> </div></div></div><p style=' margin:8px 0 0 0; padding:0 4px;'><a href='https://www.instagram.com/p/BqqUs08A6vf/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' style=' color:#000; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px; text-decoration:none; word-wrap:break-word;' target='_blank'>Amanda, please! #breaktheinternet</a><p style=' color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px; margin-bottom:0; margin-top:8px; overflow:hidden; padding:8px 0 7px; text-align:center; text-overflow:ellipsis; white-space:nowrap;'>A post shared by <a href='https://www.instagram.com/papermagazine/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' style=' color:#c9c8cd; font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; font-style:normal; font-weight:normal; line-height:17px;' target='_blank'> Paper Magazine</a> (@papermagazine) on <time datetime='2018-11-26T23:03:47+00:00' style=' font-family:Arial,sans-serif; font-size:14px; line-height:17px;'>Nov 26, 2018 at 3:03pm PST</time></div></blockquote><script async src='~//www.instagram.com/embed.js' type='text/javascript'></script><p> 

<p>After several years of suffering from drug addiction, Hollywood actress Amanda Bynes is back on the cover of Paper Magazine for its “Break the Internet” issue to celebrate her sobriety.<p>In the cover story, the 32-year-old star opened up about her previous struggle with substance abuse. "Even though everyone thought I was the 'good girl,' I did smoke marijuana from that point on. I didn't get addicted [then] and I wasn't abusing it. And I wasn't going out and partying or making a fool of myself...yet. Later on it progressed to doing molly and ecstasy,” confessed Amanda.<blockquote class='instagram-media' data-instgrm-captioned='' data-instgrm-permalink='https://www.instagram.com/p/BqqKqTqguws/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' data-instgrm-version='12' style=' background:#FFF; border:0; border-radius:3px; box-shadow:0 0 1px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.5),0 1px 10px 0 rgba(0,0,0,0.15); margin: 1px; max-width:540px; min-width:326px; padding:0; width:99.375%; width:-webkit-calc(100% - 2px); width:calc(100% - 2px);'><div style='padding:16px;'><div style=' display: flex; flex-direction: row; align-items: center;'><div style='background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 50%; flex-grow: 0; height: 40px; margin-right: 14px; width: 40px;'> </div><div style='display: flex; flex-direction: column; flex-grow: 1; justify-content: center;'><div style=' background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; margin-bottom: 6px; width: 100px;'> </div><div style=' background-color: #F4F4F4; border-radius: 4px; flex-grow: 0; height: 14px; width: 60px;'> </div></div></div><div style='padding: 19% 0;'> </div><div style='display:block; height:50px; margin:0 auto 12px; width:50px;'><a href='https://www.instagram.com/p/BqqKqTqguws/?utm_source=ig_embed&utm_medium=loading' style=' background:#FFFFFF; line-height:0; padding:0 0; text-align:center; text-decoration:none; width:100%;' target='_blank'><svg height='50px' version='1.1' viewbox='0 0 60 60' width='50px' xmlns='https://www.w3.org/2000/svg' xmlns:xlink='https://www.w3.org/1999/xlink'><g fill='none' fill-rule='evenodd' stroke='none' stroke-width='1'><g fill='#000000' transform='translate(-511.000000, -20.000000)'><g><path d='M556.869,30.41 C554.814,30.41 553.148,32.076 553.148,34.131 C553.148,36.186 554.814,37.852 556.869,37.852 C558.924,37.852 560.59,36.186 560.59,34.131 C560.59,32.076 558.924,30.41 556.869,30.41 M541,60.657 C535.114,60.657 530.342,55.887 530.342,50 C530.342,44.114 535.114,39.342 541,39.342 C546.887,39.342 551.658,44.114 551.658,50 C551.658,55.887 546.887,60.657 541,60.657 M541,33.886 C532.1,33.886 524.886,41.1 524.886,50 C524.886,58.899 532.1,66.113 541,66.113 C549.9,66.113 557.115,58.899 557.115,50 C557.115,41.1 549.9,33.886 541,33.886 M565.378,62.101 C565.244,65.022 564.756,66.606 564.346,67.663 C563.803,69.06 563.154,70.057 562.106,71.106 C561.058,72.155 560.06,72.803 558.662,73.347 C557.607,73.757 556.021,74.244 553.102,74.378 C549.944,74.521 548.997,74.552 541,74.552 C533.003,74.552 532.056,74.521 528.898,74.378 C525.979,74.244 524.393,73.757 523.338,73.347 C521.94,72.803 520.942,72.155 519.894,71.106 C518.846,70.057 518.197,69.06 517.654,67.663 C517.244,66.606 516.755,65.022 516.623,62.101 C516.479,58.943 516.448,57.996 516.448,50 C516.448,42.003 516.479,41.056 516.623,37.899 C516.755,34.978 517.244,33.391 517.654,32.338 C518.197,30.938 518.846,29.942 519.894,28.894 C520.942,27.846 521.94,27.196 523.338,26.654 C524.393,26.244 525.979,25.756 528.898,25.623 C532.057,25.479 533.004,25.448 541,25.448 C548.997,25.448 549.943,25.479 553.102,25.623 C556.021,25.756 557.607,26.244 558.662,26.654 C560.06,27.196 561.058,27.846 562.106,28.894 C563.154,29.942 563.803,30.938 564.346,32.338 C564.756,33.391 565.244,34.978 565.378,37.899 C565.522,41.056 565.552,42.003 565.552,50 C565.552,57.996 565.522,58.943 565.378,62.101 M570.82,37.631 C570.674,34.438 570.167,32.258 569.425,30.349 C568.659,28.377 567.633,26.702 565.965,25.035 C564.297,23.368 562.623,22.342 560.652,21.575 C558.743,20.834 556.562,20.326 553.369,20.18 C550.169,20.033 549.148,20 541,20 C532.853,20 531.831,20.033 528.631,20.18 C525.438,20.326 523.257,20.834 521.349,21.575 C519.376,22.342 517.703,23.368 516.035,25.035 C514.368,26.702 513.342,28.377 512.574,30.349 C511.834,32.258 511.326,34.438 511.181,37.631 C511.035,40.831 511,41.851 511,50 C511,58.147 511.035,59.17 511.181,62.369 C511.326,65.562 511.834,67.743 512.574,69.651 C513.342,71.625 514.368,73.296 516.035,74.965 C517.703,76.634 519.376,77.658 521.349,78.425 C523.257,79.167 525.438,79.673 528.631,79.82 C531.831,79.965 532.853,80.001 541,80.001 C549.148,80.001 550.169,79.965 553.369,79.82 C556.562,79.673 558.743,79.167 560.652,78.425 C562.623,77.658 564.297,76.634 565.965,74.965 C567.633,73.296 568.659,71.625 569.425,69.651 C570.167,67.743 570.674,65.562 570.82,62.369 C570.966,59.17 571,58.147 571,50 C571,41.851 570.966,40.831 570.82,37.631'></path></g></g></g></svg></a></div><div style='padding-top: 8px;'><div style=' color:#3897f0; 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word-wrap:break-word;' target='_blank'>#BreaktheInternet: Amanda Bynes. Having spent years out of the spotlight, Bynes steps back in and opens up about her tumultuous — and remarkable — journey. #linkinbio Story by @abbyschreiber28 Photos by @daniellelevitt Art Direction by @dwndwntwn Styling by @neverhavetotweet Hair by @samiknighthair Makeup by @edwardcruzmakeup Set Design by @_coopervasquez_ Fashion Direction: @miaasolkin</a>

The Hollywood actress is also set to receive her hard-earned Associate of Arts degree this month.

Amanda Bynes celebrates three years of being sober, opens up about her drug addiction in the past | PUSH.COM.PH