While other moms quickly give in to the whims of their kids in mid-tantrum, Judy Ann Santos said she is not one to do that. Not that she is a heartless mom, but the mother of Yohann and Lucho said she believes that it’s important to look at the long-term effects of spoiling your kids.
“Kasi sa akin kapag binigay mo kasi sa bata ‘yung gusto niya oras na nag-tantrums siya, gagawin at gagawin niya ‘yon. Pero kapag nakita niya sa ‘yo na hindi ka niya nakukuha sa iyak, hihingi ng maayos sayo kung ano ‘yung gusto niya,” she explained.
For Juday, this approach would teach the child to be “nicer” the next time he wants something. She added, “Hindi kasi ako nadadala sa tantrums eh. Kahit sa mga anak ko, hinahayaan ko sila na mag-tantrums hanggang sa manabang sila.”
Juday admitted that motherhood has allowed her to experience “tampuhans” between her and the kids from time to time. But she reiterated that “it never came to a point na naglulupasay sila sa malls or maglulupasay sila sa harapan ng maraming tao kasi alam nilang hindi sila uubra ng ganon sa amin.”
She also opened up about her kids’ grandparents. Juday laughingly shared that she has given up going against her Mommy Carol and husband Ryan Agoncillo’s parents with their endearing gestures for their kids, whom she added they rarely get to be with.
“Kasi parang nilalagay na lang rin namin ‘yung posisyon namin sa kanila, [na] kapag tumanda kami at nagkaroon kami ng mga apo, I’m pretty sure we’ll spoil them also,” she said.
Mostly though, Judy Ann said she subscribes to the point raised by one of her friends, who also happens to be a very doting lolo. “Kasi ang explanation niya, ‘Tapos na ako eh, kapag nakulitan na ako sa kanila babalik ko lang sila sa mga magulang nila so gusto ko kapag nasa akin sila mahal nila ako,’” the actress recalled.
If anything, Juday is very grateful that her in-laws and her mother, in a way know their boundaries, particularly when it comes to their own way of enforcing disciplinary actions. “Halimbawa grounded sa ganito konektado ‘yun sa bahay nila,” the award-winning actress shared.
Juday is set to celebrate her fifth wedding anniversary with husband Ryan this coming April 28. Her one big learning to date she said is that marriage, as they say, is really a “work in progress.”
“It’s a forever work in progress at that. Parang siyempre sabay kayong tumatanda, nag-iiba ‘yung mga likes niyo and ‘yung mga hobbies ninyo. Nagkakaroon ng mga bad moods, sabay din kayong natututo. Feeling ko ‘yung adjustment mas naging madali. Madali samin ‘yung acceptance na ‘Ah sa part na ito may mali ako, so okay kakambyo ako dito,’” Juday said.
She said she believes that they have also matured when it comes to resolving arguments and coming up with attainable and agreeable resolutions every time. “Para hindi naman kami nakikitaan na nag-aaway ng mga bata.”
But overall, their five years as husband and wife have been quick and blissful. “Parang hindi nga namin naramdaman na limang taon na pala ‘yon.”